We All Want Impossible Things

Content Warning: This section of the guide discusses terminal illness, death, and grieving, which feature in the source text.

In a novel exploring the relationship of two friends as one of them is dying, the theme of life and death is a natural point of reference. As Edi is trying to figure out how to handle dying, Ash is trying her best to figure out how to live. The catalyst for both characters’ journeys is Edi’s illness.

It is suggested that Ash’s erratic, self-sabotaging behavior is a response to Edi’s diagnosis and the stress of trying to deal with losing her best friend. Thinking back on the infidelity that led to the dissolution of her marriage, Ash wonders if she was unfaithful to Honey because of what was going on with her friend: “Edi had just been diagnosed. Not that that’s any excuse, honestly—Edi getting sick. I don’t even know if that’s part of the reason or not” (63). Ash may be unsure, but Edi isn’t. She sees Ash’s behavior as destructive, and is frustrated with her for failing to embrace the fact that she, unlike Edi, has a chance for a happy life.

From Edi’s